Death

From

Above

>THUD<

These are funny.

The first time I ever encountered DFA (not Drugs For All) was in a mecha-mash type role-playing game. Ya know - the kind with dice that can survive a power outage. A mech would plummet from the sky, land on top of an enemy's mech and somehow be the victor of the fight. Definitely a Mario Bros throwback.

Now the years fast-forward. A new Decade-Century-Millennium! has begun and with it a new kind of game..........

Where people still leap at incredible heights and try to squash each other. De_Vertigo: I am guilty of attempted Death from Above. Yeah, that damn ladder. Even when I KNOW there's a T waiting for me, I somehow get it in my head that I will descend from the ceiling like an avenging angel, I will land upon the infidel's shoulders, shove my barrel into his ocular socket and pull the trigger at least 3 times. I mean, it looks great in Heavy Gear Demos - right?

Well, first big problem is that he's waiting for me. So he's not standing right there but off to the side. Aiming. Second big problem, I cannot hop up onto boxes, or duck through windows much less navigate footwork on a ladder. So Down I go - like a drunk SMU co-ed. My teammates try to toss grenades down to cushion my fall. There's a sickening crunch and if I'm still alive enough to twitch - the T sticks me in the toe with his knife, knowing it's not worth the bullet.

Then I go get a sandwich.

Now that I've telegraphed my usual tactics to every terrorist player, we'll move on.

The only time I've ever seen DFA work is during those Tom & Jerry moments. Usually these occur on Dust. Guy hops off the bridge and lands on someone's head. To the passerby, they look like they're trying to Do The Boost. The more observant people realize they are of opposing teams. The dead are laughing their asses off because the next second's gonna be good. Makes ya wish these skins could come with expressions. Like Worms Armageddon Meets CounterStrike. "Take Cover!!" Little eyes bulging out from behind a ski mask. Maybe we can get little tombstones to pop up that say "Awped."

"Died because I was stupid"

"Camped by a n00b"

"Brought a knife to a gunfight"

Who needs a bomb when you've got a sheep? Imagine letting one of those lose into a spawn zone. Come to think of it, that game had air strikes. Real death from above.

If you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about - FOR SHAME!!! You're on the internet - go, go, search.

Ya can't help but land on the head of a GSG9 skin on Dust - they insist the helmet's yellow. Oh, excuse me. Tan. So you glance down to see if the coast is clear and you don't notice the ground is closer or carrying a para. You'd think the Germans would look up from under the bridge and say "Good Heavens, it's raining Iraqis!"

I've seen Death From Above work, but almost always for the squishee - as opposed to the squisher, or the guy who had the bright idea in the first place. Usually when you land on someone, they simply shoot. If they're in a spiteful mood, they'll bounce a grenade off the opposing wall and take you with them. Though I've had someone land on my head and pistol whip me, but I just suck. I think it was [NO] Fear. I vaguely remember him jumping up and down on my head yelling die, die, die! Let's consider reality for a bit. Death From Above still looks like a good idea, but remembering my first stage dive shows a SEVERE drawback. People are not soft.

No, Death From Above is only good with a knife. You don't waste ammo, the secondary attack is really vicious, and most importantly -you look c001.

Screw it, I can't get this HMTL to space the way I want it to.